Carmen: Considering the Future

Carmen is hoping for less stress in her life in the future. She needs to get her father moved and does not yet know the outcome for her mother's response to cancer treatment. Her wishes for the future speak to the importance of family in her life.

I’m just hoping we can have some good quality family time at the lake. I’ve got simple needs. I really do. I just want my family around me and to be happy and not stressful and to have fun. I don’t need much but I want Lily around to enjoy life as long as is possible. I remember her second suicide attempt. I looked her right in the eye and I said promise me you won’t ever do this again. And she promised me. If there ever was one thing I was ever sure of, it was she would never do it again. Until the day she tried again. So now I’m not sure of anything. There’s no guarantee of anything. There isn’t. I just want us to be a happy family and have fun together as long as we can.

She is looking forward to her daughter’s wedding next year and Lily’s continued involvement with her children. She sees Lily as her children’s “surrogate mother.” Lily tutors her younger nephew in math and shares interests in books and trivia with her niece. Carmen’s older son shares the characteristics of being humorous, smart, kind, and caring in common with Lily.

Carmen emphasized the strength of their relationship and Lily’s contributions and place in the family.

We do have a really good strong relationship and honest. I am not afraid to ask the question, are you suicidal. She’ll be honest with me and then I can be honest with her. Her support with my mom that she’s been able to provide, that’s been helpful. And support with my kids—that special relationship that they have. Takes the pressure off me that they have somebody else that they can talk to and go to. I’m proud of her—the way she contributes and makes a difference. I’m proud of her for giving. She’s really an incredible, incredible person.

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