When debts accumulated during Don’s manic episodes, they had to sell off a major portion of their farm land. Don decided he does not want to apply for disability and told Brenda he believes they are doing okay on her income. Brenda has taken over the role of conservator and now manages the couple’s finances.
My biggest loss I think was I felt really bad we lost the majority of the farm. There was part of me that was like should I have stayed? I’ve always been one of these people—until death do us part. But I felt I was really led to get out of there. It was safety for me and the kids and the grandkids. I did what I could. But yet another part of me said it was not my farm to lose. It had been given to him and he had made some poor choices. To me it’s just stuff.
Brenda took a class for guardian conservators and accessed online tutorials to prepare for management of their finances. Together Don and Brenda worked out a system that provides him with spending money but also limits how much he can spend.